Villiers vignettes... on the benefits of privatisation

Telegrammed by Our Man at 222 Marylebone Road
That Bourbon moment...

Theresa Villiers: on 22 July. "The hon. Gentleman's views on the railways are well known, although I am afraid that I do not share them. It would have been impossible for there to have been the significant growth in passenger numbers that we have seen since privatisation without the benefits that private sector innovation and enterprise have brought. Reversing things and renationalising the *railways* would be a retrograde step."

Oh bliss, John Major lives!! Talk dirty to us, Theresa

But why did you miss out 'entrepreneurial flair'.

And where was the obligatory side swipe at 'deeply inefficient British Rail'?

The key to good retro lies in the detail. So, sadly, only 7 out of 10.

But thanks for trying.

UPDATE: This from Leo Pink...

Surely the bulk of the growth came after the Strategic Rail Authority was subsumed into DfT and the state took control of timetabling, rolling stock policy, franchise service specification.

UPDATE: This from Captain Deltic...

Isn't "rolling stock policy" an oxymoron?

UPDATE: This from Steve Strong...

So how does Theresa explain the growth on state owned London Underground over the same period which was equal to, if not greater than, that experienced on the privatised BR network?

Hammond - all talk and no trousers

Telegrammed by Ithuriel
To recap on Bonusgate...

According to the Guardian report on the Network Rail AGM, . 'There were 37 votes in favour of the pay report, 31 against and nine active abstentions, including the Department for Transport's single vote'.

Oh yes, DfT is indeed a member.

And Mr Hammond has been writing to Ricky Haystacks asking him to go easy on the Iain Coucher Classic Car fund payments.

Not only that but the Prime Minister's spokeswoman said that Mr Cameron was 'disappointed'.at the news of the vote in favour of moolah-all-round.

So come on Phil - why did DfT abstain?

Pointless signs - Norwich

And which 'footbridge or subway' might that be then?

Fenchurch Street to close in 2011?

It appears that an email is doing the rounds of c2c customers announcing that Fenchurch Street is going to be closed for 8 months in 2011 for refurbishment work.

Sadly The Fact Compiler hasn't seen the offending message - but it is clearly being taken very seriously by C2C who have felt obliged to issue the following denial to all their customers...

From: c2c Alerting Service
Date: 22 July 2010 16:58:31 GMT+01:00
To:
Subject: London Fenchurch Street Station - A message to all our customers

London Fenchurch Street station - A message to all our customers

I would like to reassure c2c customers who have contacted us in recent days after having received emails from friends or colleagues claiming that London Fenchurch Street station is to be temporarily closed in 2011 for a period of months as part of a proposed redevelopment of the station and surrounding area. The e-mail is entirely spurious and its original source is unknown, but it has been widely circulated and has caused understandable concern to those people receiving it.

I can categorically confirm that this rumour is totally untrue. There are no plans whatsoever for any such major closure of London Fenchurch Street either in 2011 or later.

I hope this clarifies matters and reassures all our customers. There are no plans to close Fenchurch Street .

Julian Drury
Managing Director
c2c

Truth travels like a tortoise, rumour like a hare.

IPSA - Why we should care

The Fact Compiler shared the fury over troughing MPs in the last Parliament.

Stung into action by the near universal opprobrium being heaped upon them, MPs passed a measure in haste creating the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority (IPSA).

The new body was set up to oversee the allowances paid to MPs and the salaries of the staff they employed.

As with so many measures enacted in haste by the last Parliament there is now plenty of time to repent at leisure.

And MPs are not happy with the new system.

Of course many will say that MPs had it coming, whilst others are pleased that MPs now finally realise that the legion of new laws which they so joyously enacted are now buggering-up their own lives not just ours.

No matter.

IPSA is now preventing MPs from serving their constituents and this is bad for both democracy and democratic accountability.

As one Westminster insider put it "IPSA makes NR's Members look useful".

In an attempt to explain the new MP's expenses scheme Tom Harris, Co-Chair of the APPRG, has provided the following helpful video on his blog.



For full details of the disaster that is IPSA and why we should all be concerned read more here.

"The Prime Minister will be deeply disappointed"

So.

According to the Number 10 spokeswoman in the Lobby today "The Prime Minister will be deeply disappointed" by the decision of Network Rail's Members to rubber stamp director bonuses.

Indeed.

But what are we to make of this from Network Rail's press release on today's disappointing proceedings:

Network Rail today held its annual general meeting in Manchester attended by 59 of its 100 members... with 77 members voting.

So 41 Members of Network Rail couldn't be bothered to attend the company's Annual Meeting.

Clearly they know the game is up.

Whilst 23 couldn't even be arsed to vote at all!

What a testament to Network Rail's fabulous corporate governance.

So what difference did these 23 abstentions make?

Only 54% (of the 77 who did bother to vote) approved the Directors' Remuneration Report as set out on pages 30 to 49 of the Company’s Accounts for the year ended 31 March 2010

Oh shame on those Members that abstained - you know who you are.

What earthly value are you to man or beast?

The abolition of the rightly named 'Members' cannot come soon enough!

Come on Phil, put them out of our misery and that right soon.

UPDATE: This from the Gruaniad...

There were 37 votes in favour of the pay report, 31 against and nine active abstentions including the Department for Transport's single vote.

A word on today's ticket machine story.

This from a Mr Malins...

Did I not hear the Passenger Focus man Smith berating the TOCs for their failings on Radio 4 this morning?

Consider then that the response of Bus Barons and DafT to this failing is to install ticket barriers to "recover" the money for the tickets the TOCs did not sell properly in the first place!


With stockade station - HMP Walton-on-Thames the result.

UPDATE: This from Globetrotter...

I wonder whether the latest Passenger Focus survey is investigating the symptoms rather than the cause?

Does the dissatisfaction expressed by ticket machine users really reflect concerns over the problem of using the machines themselves, or is it really a reflection of the complexity of the current fare structures?

Given that a substantial number of booking office staff seem to have problems explaining and selling all the different ticket options, it is not surprising that passengers have problems navigating the system when left to do it themselves.

Particularly now that ATOC has helpfully 'simplified' the process by giving all the different ticket types the same names.

Villiers vignettes...

Oh dear.

Following recent cock-ups with public pronouncements (Eye passim) has the Saviour of the Jammy Dodger lost the confidence of her departmental colleagues?

Although Theresa has responsibility for both Rail and Aviation the announcement today on reforming the framework for regulating airports was unveiled by no less a figure than Petrol-head himself!

Proposals designed to improve Britain's major airports were unveiled by Transport Secretary Philip Hammond today...

After careful consideration, the Government has decided not to give a new remit to Passenger Focus to represent air passengers as had previously been proposed. The Government believes that it is important to have strong passenger representation but that this is not the time to be make additional structural changes which will add to the regulatory burden on industry. It will therefore be exploring options for strengthening existing passenger representation arrangements.

Surely not the sort of nuts and bolts announcement that is usually made by a Secretary of State?

No matter.

Perhaps Theresa can now find time to answer some of those invitations that she is famous for ignoring?

Pointless signs - East Coast on-train WiFi

With a bowler tip to @johnpopham, via Twitter.

Lookalike - Black Adder Rail

Villiers vignettes... apology accepted

Regular readers may recollect that Eye took the Saviour of the Jammy Dodger to task on Monday 12th July for misleading the House about rolling stock orders.

Clearly someone has been reading Eye, for lo and behold Cruella had to deliver this Ministerial Correction yesterday (19th July):

• Email me when Theresa Villiers speaks
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Theresa Villiers (Minister of State (Rail and Aviation), Transport; Chipping Barnet, Conservative)

I regret to inform the House that there was an inaccuracy in the answer I gave to parliamentary question 4042 on 7 July 2010, Hansard, column 265W, about what new rolling stock orders have been placed for each rail franchise since 2007.

The table was incomplete and omitted the order, placed in April 2009 by National Express East Anglia, for 120 new EMU vehicles.

The full table is reproduced below.

Franchise	Order date	Type	Vehicles
Southern	May-07	EMU	48
London Midland	Aug-07	EMU	148
London Midland	Dec-07	DMU	69
Chiltern Railway	Jan-08	DMU	8
Southern	Mar-08	EMU	44
Virgin West Coast	Sep-08	EMU	106
National Express East Anglia	Apr-09	EMU	120

Just fancy that!

UPDATE: This from Captain Deltic, the HLOS Vehicle Finder General...

There you are Theresa, doesn't that feel better?

Now what about the 8th June table you published?

Yes, the Table with the double counting I mentioned to Philip Hammond's SpAd at the time?

And has the civil servant responsible now been transferred to work on TramTrains?

30% dissatisfied with rail ticket purchasing

Telegrammed by Our Man at 222 Marylebone Road
Clearly the train operators are living in a parallel universe when an SWT press release can glibly say:

"Passenger Focus research, shows around seven in every 10 customers are satisfied with rail ticket purchasing facilities".

And they expect us to consider this a major achievement?

Out in the real world, for any business to have an activity which left 30% of customers dissatisfied would see a rapid change in the management responsible.

Especially since this is the operation which delivers cash flow.

Perhaps Petrol-head should invite Archie Norman or Sir Stuart Rose to run the retail side of franchises?

Tomorrow's NR annual meeting - a swan song?

Tomorrow is Network Rail's annual meeting where the company's Members will fail to hold it to account.

Eye offers the following directions and guidance to NR members in advance of the meeting.

Enjoy the moment, savour the food and drink, contribute proportionately to Iain Coucher's farewell present, avoid being seen with Tony Berkeley and don't forget to vote for everything the company proposes.

But it might be wise not to say 'see you next year'...

Meanwhile, back in the real world, don't expect huge interest in NR's CEO vacancy following these wise words from Hammond and McNulty delivered at the latest value for money workshop yesterday:

Petrol-head: "The current set-up is an enormously complex and elaborate structure to deliver pseudo market forces... The passenger is at the margin of influencing things."

McNulty: "Is the current set-up conducive to cost reduction and value for money... (it was) established without reference to these objectives. Radical change is required otherwise the end result will not be very different from what we see today."

One piece of good news.

The post McNulty world looks like affording plenty of free diary time to former NR members and directors alike.

UPDATE: This from Ithuriel...

Make your mind up Sir Roy.

You say:

"Radical change is required otherwise the end result will not be very different from what we see today."

But in the foreword to your recent scoping study you said that the choice is between "changing the way we operate or decreasing the size and the quality of the network."

Which sounds very different "from what we see today"!

Who should replace Coucher - one for the Ladies?

Network Rail has done much to encourage the role of ladies in the industry, despite suggestions to the contrary (see Private Eye passim).

As Iain Coucher spake but recently:

“We want the best to work for us – both men and women – and I hope that as we continue to show our modern business and the opportunities that we offer that we can attract exceptional women to apply for these roles and be part of something fantastic.”

A part of something fantastic indeed!

With Iain's words ringing in our ears Eye readers are invited to use their skill and judgement to decide which of these Wimmin of Power should be Network Rail's new CEO.

• Margaret Thatcher - approved more electrified routes miles than any other Prime Minister and delivered a new railway to Abroad!

• Imelda Marcos - expert on procurement.

• Pollyanna Walker - already has a team second guessing NR's every move.

• Jo Kaye - expert on delivering small improvement schemes (eg Workington North) that don't eat into Director's bonuses (Shurely 'cost a fortune'? Ed)

• Boadicea - skilled at reducing headcount, usually by cutting off below the knees (That's enough powerful ladies. Ed).

You can vote on the right hand side menu bar (once the blogger poll gadget decides to work)...

UPDATE: Sadly Blogger's crappy poll gadget isn't working, so just pretend you are an NR Director, pull a number out of the air and then remind yourself that you are worth it.

Colonel Michael Cobb RIP

Sad news indeed.

This from the Daily Telegraph...

Colonel Michael Cobb, who has died aged 93, was a regular Army officer who in retirement produced the definitive historical atlas of the railways of Great Britain, becoming on the strength of it the oldest person ever to receive a PhD from Cambridge University, at the age of 91.

The Railways of Great Britain - Historical Atlas is a wonderful piece of work, useful to professionals and enthusiasts alike.

If you ain't got one - buy one now.

If you have one, then buy another!

Good effort Colonel Michael Cobb and requiescat in pace.

Train Police Warn on Shopping-trolleys

Eye salutes our brave Boys in Blue!

This piece of super sleuthing from the British Transport Police website:

POLICE APPEAL AFTER TRAIN STRIKES ABANDONED SHOPPING TROLLEY – AXMINSTER

British Transport Police (BTP) officers are appealing for information after a train struck an abandoned shopping trolley that had been left on the tracks near to Axminster.

Shocking news indeed!

Helpfully the BTP website also shows an image of exactly how disruptive the remains of a shopping trolley in the four foot can be!


But what's this?


Errr... chaps, exactly how many of these 'trolley' remains have you discovered?

Railway Garden Competition - Bletchley

Welcome to Bletchley - the winner of this week's "Can't be Arzed Award".


A veritable celebration of wilful neglect.


Now if TOCs like London Midland can't be trusted in the small things, like keeping platforms weed free, then what on earth makes ATOC think that they can be trusted to deliver on the really exacting demands of longer franchises?

Either way it's time for Captain Permatan, or his London Midland minions, to splash out on some Round-Up, and pretty damn quick!

The advert for the NR CEO job has appeared...

This from Jumbo...

In spite of his endorsement by Eye readers, General Stan McChrystal is unlikely to take the job when he reads the job application guff that appeared in the Sunday Times and Sunday Telegraph yesterday.

"An instinct for pushing the boundaries of pace, ambition and innovation to the edge of possibility" may appeal to recruitment consultants but is hardly likely to attract a real candidate of action.

So maybe, the Eye should put together an alternative job specification.

To start the process how about?

• To reduce the cost of Network Rail to the taxpayer in a way that minimises the impact on passengers and freight customers

• To stop the company kidding themselves that trains that arrive 10 minutes late are on time

• To increase capacity on the network by reducing the padding in train schedules
  

• To argue the case that capacity on the network should be increased by the use of longer trains that optimise the number of seats per train path.

Further suggestions on what the industry expects from NR's new CEO welcome.

ORR - qui custodiet ipsos custodes?

Telegrammed by Bulldog Drummond
The Sunday Times today features Anna 'Pollyanna' Walker as its page 5 girl.

Perhaps not a surprise that in the accompanying photo Pollyanna has such a big grin.

As the Sunday Times notes she left the Healthcare Commission with a bung of £250k plus pension payments before gliding into the ORR on £120k a year.

Not bad for someone whose knowledge of railways is limited to rail journeys from Paddington to Ludlow, supplemented by occasional visits to hear Iain Coucher's excellent and balanced views on how the railways should be run.

Meanwhile, as We Are All In It Together, anyone care to speculate how much Pollyanna has trimmed from ORR's budget and headcount over the last year?

Railway Garden Competition - Bolton