Pointless signs and pointless announcements

This from Captain Deltic...

Whilst on the subject of Pointless Signs, what about Pointless Announcements?

Has anyone ever seen any passenger get up and 'familiarise' themselves with the safety notices following pre-departure announcements?

UPDATE: This from the Warton Wizard...

At Leeds we have:

"Due to today's wet weather surfaces may be slippery when wet" even when it's sunny

"It is an offence to trespass on the railway, please keep off the tracks"

"This station operates a no smoking policy"

"Security staff patrol this station 24 hours a day"

plus a ludicrous one about a left luggage facility as well as many, many more.

Perhaps Eye should start a feature called Railway Gob-Shittery?

An excellent idea, thank you Warton Wizard.

Have you examples of fatuous announcements, railway gob-shittery or pointless noise pollution? If so send them to Eye at the usual address.

Pointless Garden Competition - Conflation edition

This from Cheers Joe...

I notice that the themes of your blog have met head on at Limehouse.


I do not know whether that station also has pointless announcements.

However, I am always reassured by the announcements at SouthEastern stations that warn one to take care on the platforms "due to an incident of weather".

Pointless signs - the audio version

This from a Mr Malins...

There are as many, probably a lot more, pointless announcements as there are pointless signs.

At Bridgend there is an automated one running on the footbridge with the same message, but interestingly only in English.

Surely they could have added Welsh for good measure, and this one runs all night, even when there is no traffic.

Maybe it's for the Clubbers coming back from Swansea, who are in no condition to take it in anyway.