Corby Trouser Press

Much excitement at Corby where Network Rail has built a beautiful new station (on time).

Unfortunately intending passengers will now have to wait until March for the service to begin.

Deputy leader of Corby Council Mark Pengelly said: "This is shambolic. We will have a train station by December 14 so North Northants Development Company and English Partnerships have done their bit. The people who have let us down are the private rail companies. They have had a year to find the trains."

Perhaps First group, owner of Hull Trains, can explain the delay?

Un-Beeching

Good news from the Liberal Democrats!

The Beeching cuts of the 1960s will be reversed if the Liberal Democrats win power, according to today's Yorkshire Post.

Pictured is a fruit cake.

Rumour and tittle tattle

On Sunday The Fact Compiler popped round to see Brian Souter with some used carrier bags to refresh his collection.

Whilst partaking of a glass of Lidl's British Sherry with the careful entrepreneur the blackberry buzzes into life.

"It would appear", I venture, "that EMT may be short a managing director!"

The Stagecoach tycoon races out the room, after carefully locking away the tupperware, to make a call.

He returns.

With a negative nod of his head he resumes counting the sugar cubes and The Fact Compiler takes his leave.

The Fact Compiler also understands that recent rumours about the MD of FGW have no similar basis in truth...

Remembrance Sunday

Rutles Rail

Splendid news for Oakham and Melton Mowbray (pop 342).

According to Transit a new open access operator is hoping to serve the two towns.

Simon Pielow, formerly of Eurostar and now MD of Train Chartering is behind the open access venture.

The new company, Rutles Rail, has already had discussions with the ORR and Network Rail to identify paths.



The Rutles previously had considerable success in the 1960s as a pop band.

Unacceptable face of capitalism

First has come out in support of a third runway at Heathrow.

Moir Lockhead, the charmless Chief Executive of First Group, says the airport should be expanded.

Words that have delighted First's Thames Valley customers who have expressed near universal dismay at the scheme.

Presumably Lockjaw's damescene conversion to Heathrow expansion has nothing to do with DafT's soon to be announced decision that electrification of the Great Western will be a priority?

Cross purposes

A question for those masters of the black-arts the Timetable Planners.

BAA has divied up £240m for Crossrail

In return Lord Adonis, Prince of Daftness, has promised BAA 'four fast-train services an hour' to Heathrow.

Obviously these 'fast trains' will not stop at all stations.

The core tunnelled section, linking Paddington and Liverpool Street, is being designed to handle a maximum of 24tph (trains per hour) and it is upon this service pattern that the Crossrail business case is predicated.

If you run a mixed traffic railway (fast and slow trains) you reduce capacity - fast trains requiring a greater headway.

Is the Fact Compiler correct in thinking that for a mess of pottage DafT has sacrificed 24tph and the current Crossrail business case?

59% say Ross must go!

A very disappointing result from the latest Railway Eye survey.

Readers were invited to answer the simple question "Should Iain Coucher reject the ORR Final Determination?".

The correct answer as any fule kno was "Jonathon Ross should resign".

Well done to the 59% of you who got it right. The rest of you - 100 lines; "I must try harder".

Prince of Daftness

Telegrammed by our man at 222 Marylebone Road
More tosh from the factually challenged Lord Adonis, Prince of Daftness

Lord Wallace of Saltaire (Deputy Leader, House of Lords; Liberal Democrat) Hansard source
My Lords, the arrangements whereby railway leasing companies own the stock and the Government order it appear to have provided substantial and reliable revenue and profit for banks over the past few years. Do the Government intend to revisit the arrangements whereby rolling stock is acquired, owned and leased?

Lord Adonis (Minister of State, Department for Transport; Labour)
My Lords, we intend to keep the existing structure in place, but the department has a very keen interest in ensuring that these 1,300 vehicles are procured as rapidly as we practically can. I would not want to close particular options for the way that we might procure those vehicles.

You wouldn't think it from the pace of negotiations with the TOCs!!

Lords a lying

Telegrammed by our man at 222 Marylebone Road
Do they take us for fools?

Lord Adonis (Minister of State, Department for Transport; Labour) Hansard source
"The Department for Transport does not determine the amount of rolling stock for First Great Western (FGW) or any other train operator".

This from the South Central ITT published just a few days later:
"From December 2011 until September 2013 the South Central Franchisee will need to make available to First Capital Connect ("FCC") 3 x 4 car dual-voltage 377 units per weekday".

How does one go about impeaching a minister?

Un-Micromanagement

Telegrammed by our man at 222 Marylebone Road
As is well rehearsed by rail ministers DafT does not get involved in the detail of running franchises.

Here's a non-example from the South Central Franchise Invitation to Tender.

"Bidders’ attention is drawn to the problem of delays between train arrival and door opening at Victoria associated with problems with the GPS signal at that station. This often means that whilst a train is at a stand passengers have to wait 20-30 seconds before the doors are opened.

"Proposals are sought as to how this issue can be remedied with a view to a solution early within the life of the franchise."

Not a sparrow falls

ECML wires down...

...again.

Doh!

Daft peerless!

My Lord Adonis is starting to have fun at the expense of his officials.

Or so it would appear from this exchange in the Upper House on Tuesday 4th November:

The Earl of Mar and Kellie (Spokesperson in the Lords, Transport; Liberal Democrat) Hansard source
My Lords, the Minister will have seen the Rail Regulator's determination. Does he agree that the rolling stock plan is an incomprehensible muddle, as stated in paragraphs 9.82 and 28.22?

Lord Adonis (Minister of State, Department for Transport; Labour)
No, my Lords, it was all crystal clear to me.

So a 'comprehensible muddle' M'lord?

Keep up!

RMT has welcomed the publication of TfL's 10 year Business Plan.

General Secretary Bob Crow said

“TfL has made vague statements about the need to reduce headcount across TfL and that can only cause alarm among our members.

“Reducing the use of over-priced outside consultants is all well and good, but there can be no question of any job losses among the people who deliver the services that London depends on".

And delivering is key Bob - hint

Oh dear

Following the previous post an angry email reaches Railway Eye.

It reads:

"Not content with using Derbyshire taxes to fund schemes that solely benefit the south, like Crossrail and the Olympics, it now appears that Londoners are determined to bugger up Duffield's local road network as well!"

By way of explanation the provincial gentleman was kind enough to furnish an article from last Friday's Derby Evening Telegraph.

The Fact Compiler doesn't understand the problem. L21 could have powered the hamlet of Duffield for a week!

Boris the Proud?

Good news for pyramid of piffle fans.

London Mayor Boris Johnson today launched his personal vision for transport in the capital in a document entitled 'Way to Go!'.

If only it were so.

There is no mention of the future of the Underground PPP, or the cross-river tram and precious little on Crossrail; all of which will consume vast amounts of public dosh.

However, amongst this very thin gruel is one bit of good news.

Boris has decided to rechristen the Thames Tideway tunnel as the Cloaca Maxima.

An interesting choice as, under the guiding hand of Tarquin the Proud, the original claca drained the swamp that allowed the Forum to become the centre of Rome's civic life

But what's this? Tarquin the Proud's rule was so corrupt that his system of government was abolished and he died in exile.

Way to Go! Boris.

Holding to account

This for Railway Eye's enthusiast friends, who appear to be bearing the brunt of our headlong rush into tyranny.



Wishing all Railway Eye readers a happy commemoration of the 5th of November!

Clue's in the name

Telegrammed by our man at 222 Marylebone Road
The whole point about the High Level Output Specification was that the civil serpents who drafted the 2005 Railways Act were determined to nail ministers down.

That is why it's called a SPECIFICATION.

So who drafted Paul Clark's 3rd November Written Answer?

Paul Clark (PPS (Rt Hon Ed Balls, Secretary of State), Department for Children, Schools and Families; Gillingham, Labour) | Hansard source

"The Department for Transport is in the early stages of discussions with First Great Western on plans to implement capacity increases to which the Government committed in their High Level Output Statement of July 2007"

Is it possible for DafT to get any more sloppy?

Wright track?

Telegrammed by an 'anonymous' reader
"Railway Eye's man at 222 Marylebone Road makes the schoolboy error of many commentators.

"It is not pro free-market (see previous post) to think that unsustainable, flawed private-sector businesses should be given free government money to stay in existence - quite the opposite.

"The point about capitalism is that companies - whether Metronet or Railtrack - should be allowed to fail when they make mistakes.

"They should then be replaced with other companies.

"They should preferably be private-sector ones, but the world's a messy place and sometimes strange hybrids such as Network Rail are the only answer.

"It's certainly hard to argue they've done a worse job than Railtrack, isn't it?"

This is splendid. Railway Eye is now being 'sockpuppeted' - just like a real blog!

Conundrum

Telegrammed by our man at 222 Marylebone Road
Is Mr Wright dazed and confused?

How can Chris Randle's successor be pro-free market while supporting the creation of Railtrack's successor as a Company Limited by Guaranteed State Subsidy?

Has the 'Insider' won another comment franchise?