Telegrammed by the Archer
Heathrow gets a third runway
The roads get another £6bn
The railway gets….
...a new company to help consider the case for HS2 and further work to consider the case for further electrification
Is there no end to the bounteousness of this government?
***The Conservatives will cancel the expansion of Heathrow if they win the next General Election, Shadow Transport Secretary Theresa Villiers said today.***
Telegrammed by our Independent Expert
Transport Secretary Geoff "Doom" today announced grandiose plans for a new "HS2" from Heathrow to Birmingham in his Commons statement giving the OK to Heathrow's third runway – and global warming meltdown.
Back in the real world of travelling to the West Midlands, Beardie's lieutenants are counting their blessings, as trains to and from Euston this week have been merely "late" rather than running as "buses" or not running at all.
But as a precaution, Virgin's canny PR people are givng away Chiltern Railways' Birmingham timetables in prominent displays alongside the Euston booking office.
Always hedge your bets, as Bernie Madoff used to say!
Good news for SWT passengers
Whilst DfT has prevented the TOC closing many ticket offices there may be no one left to staff them.
This just in from SWT...
...a reduction of 480 roles... 200 to leave the company
Nice touch SWT, slip this out whilst the media are busy with the Heathrow announcement!
Good news for the Roscos.
Following the embarrassment of the Competition Commission pointing out that it was DafT's own franchising policy that made rolling stock expensive rather than monopolistic Roscos, the Department appears to have retreated into its Marsham Street bunker.
This defeatist written answer on the 18 Dec last year
Adrian Sanders (Deputy Chief Whips, Torbay, Liberal Democrat) Hansard source
To ask the Secretary of State for Transport what assessment his Department has made of the impact of the economic downturn on rolling stock operating companies; and if he will make a statement.
Paul Clark (Parliamentary Under-Secretary, Department for Transport; Gillingham, Labour)
This is a business issue for the rolling stock leasing companies and is not for the Department for Transport to determine.
Perhaps if DafT had adopted this approach in the first place it wouldn't have jizzed several million quid of our money up the wall in initiating a pointless Coco investigation.
UPDATE: Captain Deltic snorts...
Several million??
More like £25 million minimum!
The interesting bits from DafT's announcement:
Despite earlier denials Deutsche Bahn have now confirmed that they are interested in Eurostsar.
This from Reuters...
'LCR, whose principal stakeholder is Britain's Department for Transport, is open to selling Eurostar UK Ltd. "We are aware of Deutsche Bahn's interests and would be interested in hearing their proposal," said a government spokesman.'
DB it will be remembered is still owned by the German government
Meanwhile the Labour government continues to oppose state ownership of the railways... unless of course the state doing the owning is German, or French, or indeed anyone as long as it isn't British.
As SWT evidently need to save money The Fact Compiler has a suggestion.
Why not fire your media agency?
After all there is not much point in placing an ad on the Hamilton Advertiser website offering £8 SWT tickets to London.
That's probably kept one booking office open an extra hour.
UPDATE: Telegrammed by a geek...
Was that screen shot sent in by someone in Hamilton, or from someone living/working in the SWT area?
A lot of advertising is triggered not by the site but by where the user is located.
Your IP can be used to determine your location, and then appropriate advertising served.
It might not be a phuk-up at all.
Clever chaps these IT johnnies!
The Bank of Tokyo Mitsubishi UFJ Capital Corporation (BTMUCC) has launched a new rolling stock leasing company.
The new entity already has 27 locomotives and 50 freight cars on lease to lessees in the UK and Belgium.
As railway wags will quickly transform BTMUCC into 'Butt Muck' it comes as no surprise that the new ROSCO will be known as Beacon Rail.
Good news from our caring, sharing, modally-agnostic Government:
According to Downing Street "The 450 Jaguar-Land Rover staff who have been told today that they are to lose their jobs, will be given Government help to find work".
Presumably railway workers, who have been losing their jobs hand over fist, can go stuff themselves?
Charming!
'Zeppelin raid fatalities blamed on railway'.
Presumably Prince Harry's nick-name faux pax means we can no longer finger the Hun for this one!
UPDATE: Our man with a wind turbine on his chimney writes...
"The Zeppelin attack on Nottingham completely explodes rail's so called 'green' credentials.
"At a time of national emergency, when every ton of coal counted, the direct ancestor of East Midlands Trains was wasting precious energy, and increasing global warming, by leaving gas lights burning all night.
"Who will hold Tim Shoveller to account?!?"
UPDATE: Biggles writes...
"Maybe Chiltern or LOROL could bring back the Schienenzeppelin (pictured below)?"
Right. Stop this. it is getting silly!Something to delight those who know Chester station.
This from the Chester Chronicle ...
Dozens of pet rats dumped at Chester Railway Station
How did they know?
The latest Trainsadrine survey sounds nearly as scientific as those of Railway Eye.
According to their latest press release...
"The results of the first rail passenger poll of 2009... revealed that over 78 % of passenger travelling on the Liverpool to Norwich train line said they were unsatisfied or very unsatisfied with the service.
"This is the worst customer satisfaction results in the UK .
In a second poll, over 65% of passengers also called for east Midlands train company MD, Tim Shoveller, to resign."
The Fact Compiler tried to follow the link to the rest of the story, alas, Trainsardine still can't type their own web address correctly (hint: one dot too many before the org).
No matter.
From the sublime to the ridiculous.
The results of the latest exciting Eye poll shows that more than three quarters of you believe that Iain Coucher is in the sh1t.
Whatever that may mean.
Less froth please Trainsadrine and a little more substance.
They can't mean this can they?
This from the BBC...
Acting Sgt Sarah Price, from Devon and Cornwall Police, said: "There has been an unfortunate accident involving a male in collision with a train."
Some collision!
All appears not to be well in Devon & Cornwall judging by a naughty video that has appeared on Photobucket.
Not for the feint hearted, or those easily offended, it explores the difficulty of booking a day's annual leave.
As there are bound to be loads of complaints please direct them to FGW Rosters Section in Swindon.
UPDATE: This from Fidothedog over at The Lone Voice...
"Although having never worked on the railways, that video could apply to many a company I have worked for."
And this from a Teutonic reader...
"Die Bahn ist die Bahn...Heil Bahn!"
Timing as they say is everything.
Smart money suggested that Go-Ahead would keep it's head down after turning London Midland into a disaster zone in recent weeks.
So full marks to Go-Ahead for deciding to announce 300 job losses on the South Eastern today.
A move designed to gladden the hearts of Ministers battling growing unemployment figures, especially after Go-Ahead recorded profits of £131.1 million last year.
With DafT due to announce the winner of the South Central franchise in the summer, Go-Ahead must hope Ministers have short memories.....
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