An invitation from the Labour Transport Group

The Fact Compiler has received the following from the Labour Transport Group:

LTG Member, supporter, friend, colleague

At Labour Conference 2009 The Labour Transport Group are launching Labour's Transport Policy for the Future - 60 Words Campaign

Why not tell us in no more than 60 words what Labour's Transport Policy for the Future should be?

The suggestions will be posted on our website, will be debated at future LTG meetings and form the basis of our future campaigning.

Contributions already received are shown at http://blog.labourtransportgroup.org.uk

Why not join the debate and comment on the policy ideas, or write your own - simply comment on the website or email it to the admin team admin@labourtransportgroup.org.uk

Please include your name and CLP (if Labour Party Member).

Please forward this email.

Play nicely...

UPDATE: This from our International Correspondent...

"Under a Labour government the railways will be publicly owned"

"There is a commitment that there will be a publicly owned, publicly accountable railways under a Labour government"

Alastair Campbell, 16 January 1995

Seems clear enough.

UPDATE: This from a Mr Iliff...

"Consult widely, formulate a range of options, assess them against relevant criteria... then throw them away because Gordon knows best." (20 words)

Anything else would be out of character.

Is Shooter wrong?

This from Getreading...

Fuming university lecturer Kerry Renshaw has launched a petition calling for First Great Western to abolish first class tickets on journeys to London.

Alas.

As at 10:15 the petition has a mere 14 signatures!

Perhaps time for the Chilteenies to mount their own campaign to restore first class...

Leed to Manchester to be electrified!

Or possibly not.

The Yorkshire Post has the amusing tale.

Who would have guessed that Iain Coucher was brought up in Leeds...

Pharisee news

The Pope has clarified his position after it was revealed he had broken the rules on celibacy.

Citing the Crown .v. Scotland he said:

"I fully accept the findings of the Conclave that I made a technical breach of the rules. I apologise for having made this inadvertent error."

The Holy Father continued: "Of course this in not a resigning affair, despite the fact I personally promoted this particular piece of Canon law."

Dear God - How much longer must we put up with this dishonest and disreputable bunch?

UPDATE: This from Steve Strong...

Compare and contrast: £5k versus £120k

Comment would be superfluous.

UPDATE: This from John B...

Don't quite understand Steve Strong's point here.

Scotland employed 1 illegal worker; Coleman employed 12. Both of them did so unknowingly.

£10k is the maximum penalty for that; you get £2.5k off for a first offence (including multiple 'first offences' at the same time) and £2.5k off for admitting fault.

So if Coleman admits fault, he'll be fined £5k per worker like Scotland. If he doesn't, then he'll either be fined nothing or £7.5k per worker, depending on whether he can convince them he's got a defence.

UPDATE: This from a Mr Saltaire...

Am I missing the point, or is everybody else?

As I understand it, the Noble Lady (?!???!?!) was fined because she failed to keep copies of documentation, and was therefore unable to prove that she had seen and checked that documentation.

The point is, had she been able to produce copies of the said documentation, would that not have simply proved that she knew the worker was illegal, since that is apparently what she was?

We all know that the reason the opposition is not making hay on this matter, is probably because half of them are also treading on thin ice themselves in this regard.

R.I.P. honest politics!

UPDATE: This from the Velopodist...

Mr Iliffe is indeed missing the point, as are many others.

Had Lady Scotland photocopied the documents, it seems it would have proved that she was shown fairly convincing fakes.

Reading between the lines of statements issued by those investigating these things, there is an investigation going on into how said fakes got produced and collars will soon be felt.

People are getting upset about it because they want to kick the government and because she's Attorney General - except for the Daily Mail, who just can't stand any prominent left-leaning woman.

The Fact Compiler is getting upset because he is utterly scrupulous in all his dealings with officialdom and could never be reproached for even the slightest technical breach of any rule. It's one of his best-known characteristics.

The Fact Compiler is uncertain whether the Velopodist is extracting the urine?

Flying Scotsman update

Exciting news for lovers of iconic loco 4472.

As many Eye readers will know Flying Scotsman is being extensively rebuilt by the NRM.

As work continues on the locomotive there is a clamour from kettle enthusiasts, keen to see a model of 4472 in an as-is condition.

Word reaches Eye that an enterprising manufacturer has now filled this gap and according to a Mr Roden, the new product is being secretly test marketed in Launceston!


Beautiful and every dimension to the correct scale.

Success for ATOC's new media team

Absolute fury amongst the organisers and sponsors of last week's National Rail Awards, at which John Humphrys was guest speaker.

Someone or somebody broke the railway Omertà!

Which led to the following Evening Standard headline the very next day:

Mastermind? It’s just money for old rope, says John Humphrys

The piece then listed a litany of alleged faux pas from Humphrys' witty peroration.

Who could have been so naive as to have done such a thing?

Obviously someone new to the game.

No matter!

No point in crying over spilt milk.

Clearly when you sup with the Devil you should use a very long spoon... etc...

Meanwhile, perhaps best if ATOC don't invite Lydall again next year!

Mediaballs - Salisbury Journal

This shabby headline from the lame Salisbury Journal:

Train crash near Salisbury

Wrong!

The rest of the story continues:

The black Fiat Bravo was travelling south when it appears to have gone out of control and hit a garden wall on the right-hand side of the road.

The car was thrown back across the carriageway, mounted the kerb and went over the embankment onto the track, where it was hit by the 5.15am express to London Waterloo.

So that would be a 'Car Crash' then?

NR to provide Zil Lines for Olympics?

Good to see that the promise of an Olympics open to all doesn't extend to the good burghers of Nottingham.

This from the Nottingham Evening Post...

Rail chiefs claim they haven't yet decided when the station will close, but Coun Richard Jackson says Network Rail told him the work would be during the London Olympics.

So its 'Zil Lanes' for athletes and 'Zil Lines' for NR engineers.

LibDem's support 30 year franchises

This from Transport Briefing...

Conference supported shadow transport secretary Norman Baker's calls for 30 year rail franchises with five year rolling reviews that would force train operating companies to invest profits in reopening lines and stations.

With both Adonis and the Tories now in favour of longer franchises can we see an end to Dr Death's 'reign of timidity'?

Germans unveil low cost head end power unit

With a bowler tip to Turbostar...


Ouch!

2009 Railway Garden Competition - Balkan Chapter

This from Ben Jones of Model Rail magazine (which he assures Eye is piling on readers)...

Passing through Serbia on my way to Istanbul last week, I was extremely impressed by the countries efforts to win a Gold Medal in the European railway garden competition.


Belgrade’s main station is a particularly fine example of urban greenery, putting Network Rail’s efforts into perspective and setting them a challenging target for next year.


But, for sheer invention, the pile of scrap dumped alongside the new platforms at Athens Larissa station takes some beating. No prizes for spotting the ‘wild card’ item among the usual detritus.


Inspired by such sterling work from our European cousins, expect a raft of articles on how to grass over your Hornby track in Model Rail soon!

Pointless signs #14

This from a Mr MB...

I humbly offer an entry for the 'Pointless Signs' competition, spotted recently at Warrington Bank Quay.


One wonders if this is a statement of Virgin's policy regarding the employment of trans-gender staff...

UPDATE: This from Lazarus...

Not only a pointless sign but also a pointless comma which renders the message grammatically meaningless.

No need for a comma at all, or, if Virgin really want commas, put another one after "facilities".

UPDATE: This from Sir William Pollitt...

So few words, so many errors... the second comma from the sub-clause is absent (it should be after 'facilities') also the random and unnecessary capital letters ('male' and 'female' are NOT proper nouns) and the inaccurate running together of two words 'may and 'be' which, of course, should be separate.

Of course, a normal person would also have said 'person' rather than 'operative' and 'toilets' rather than 'facilities' - but as whoever commissioned this sign is clearly (deleted for reasons of taste. ED), we are not surprised.

Is there a new RE competition here, for the most illiterate railway sign? This horror takes some beating.

Andrew Scott to be Acting Director of NMSI

Internal Announcement

Andrew Scott to be Acting Director of NMSI

I have today on behalf of the Board of Trustees announced the appointment of Andrew Scott as Acting Director following the dismissal of Molly Jackson.

Ms Jackson was dismissed following questions that were raised about whether she had followed the NMSI’s Code of Conduct on potential conflicts of interest in her business dealings.

(Continues in excruciating detail for several paragraphs. Ed)

The recruitment of a new Director NRM is already underway and Andrew is reviewing what arrangements will be put in place in the meantime.

Any queries from the press should be referred to the press office in the normal way.

Lord Waldegrave

Who said Museum life was dull?

Harris joins Railnews!

Much excitement tonight amongst the railway chatterati!

From next Monday there will be a new Managing Editor of Railnews!

And its a Mr Harris!

But which one?

Could it be Tom - the off message MP?

Or Nigel - star of Rail, TV and the National Rail Awards?

Or maybe Sim - late of Rail Manager on-line fame?

Here's a clue...

Perhaps more a case of changing, rather than keeping, track....

Go-Via buys pig in a poke?

Eye welcomes the new South Central franchise which began operation yesterday

The franchise was awarded to current operator Govia (a Go-Ahead and Keolis joint venture) and will see the continuation of the Southern brand.

But what's this?

The winning bid was based on 4% revenue growth over the first two years of the franchises life.

Alas.

What looked a 'toppy' bid may now turn into a Herculean challenge.

This from the BBC...

London Underground (LU) has been hit by a fall of 190,000 journeys a day, with the recession and job losses blamed... August journey figures were 6.4% lower than the same month last year, Transport for London (TfL) said.

With loadings down on LU no doubt similar pain is being felt by NSE TOCs as well.

Watch out for eye-watering increases in unregulated ticket prices and car park charges as Govia struggles to balance the books.

Captain Deltic derailed?

This from Roger Ford's latest Informed Sources ePreview:

Talk about hubris, my warm glow at having networked the home soon vanished when nemesis followed and a few days later my computer not only wouldn’t connect to the internet over broadband, the back up dial-up stopped working too.

The Fact Compiler fears that this may have been premeditated rather than misfortunate.

Perhaps Captain Deltic should contact the Association of Old Crows to protect himself from future attacks?

Network Rail Bullsh*t Bingo

Telegrammed by Leo Pink
Term of ill omen?

In his letter summing up the results of the the two workshops held with Public Members earlier this month new Network Rail Chairman Rick Haythornthwaite refers to a facilitator present at the events as "a thought leader in institutional investment governance".

Just what NR needs - state of the art management jargon.

LibDems outline priorities - World sleeps

Exciting news from the LibDems!

This from the Evening Standard...

Crossrail not a key priority for us, warns Vince Cable.

Zzzzz...

UPDATE: This from Steve Strong...

At least Vince had a go at the "scandal" of the still empty Waterloo International Terminal.

The other parties are positively supine about it.

Adonis embarks on Marple's Memorial Meander

Hot on the tail of the Pilgrimage of Grice, the Noble Lord has taken to exploring the motorway network.

Details of the Marple's Memorial Meander here.

It will be interesting to see whether, after fighting his way around the UK road network for a week, Lord Adonis has an appetite to divert more funds into roads to relieve congestion, or whether he argues even more strongly that the railways should be developed, to get people out of their cars.

Can he hold his nerve, or will he bottle it?

UPDATE: This from Tom over at Boriswatch...

It's interesting that Lord Adonis meets up with the Chairman of the RAC Foundation straight off the bat, who are the spiritual successor to the rabid interventionist road lobby of the 1960s to 1980s.

On the other hand it's highly amusing that said gentleman had to take to the train to avoid the M25 jams...

UPDATE: Captain Deltic in calculating mood asks...

Shouldn't we know what car Lord Adonis is driving?

And what miles per gallon it is achieving?

And what average speed he is assuming to get to these various meetings on time?

Pointless signs #13

With a bowler tip to Trailer Second...