Monday, 8 September 2008

Virgin avoids Labour pain

Telegrammed by our independent expert
What is it about Virgin and the Labour big boys?

Today, as the cabinet decamped by pendolino to Birmingham for their first meeting outside London since the days of Lloyd George, the Virgin website broke down and the faithful following in their wake were unable to book tickets.

Beardie will not have forgotten the notorious encounter with Labour bigwigs in 1998, when the train carrying them to the party conference in Blackpool was severely delayed and he had to endure a humiliating dressing down by John Prescott from the conference platform.

Mind you in those dim and distant days the brothers and sisters went to cheer Mr Tony.

Today, with Gordon's popularity at an all time low, party managers were absolutely delighted that the smelly-socks couldn't make it.

How long until Beardie gets the 2014 franchise extension he's been lobbying so hard for?


Why are these to be found in the vestibules of Class 455s but not on the platforms of the stations they serve?

The Fact Compiler apologises to SWT if the 'Securitate' now demand they be removed.

Glad I asked

The Fact Compiler would like to thank those readers of the Railway Eye who took the time to vote for their favourite term of abuse for the IEP.

Readers were invited to select one of the options below:
1. The Camel Class
2. The Frankenstein Train
3. Neither of the above.

As The Fact Compiler is new to these sort of ballots he has asked well known unionist Crow Bar to assist with the collation and announcement of the results.

Just over 2,500 people visit Railway Eye each month. Of which just 50 voted in the poll.

However, Crow Bar advises that these figures are unimportant and may in fact be numeracist, so probably best forgotten about.

Therefore those results in full. Crow Bar, if you would...

"Greetings comrades. A massive 64% of you voted unambiguously for the Frankenstein Train, totally and utterly vindicating our position on this piece of nomenclature and once again reminding the exploitative private sector management classes that our members will not lie down and accept anything less than the full term of abuse when referring to the IEP. Furthermore I put management on notice that attempts to divide my membership by waving Camel Class inducements or embellishments will be perceived as a direct assault on agreed machinery and will result in a dispute situation existing between ourselves and..."

Continued p94...