Tuesday 12 July 2022

Shapps consciously uncoupled

Alas, the Curse of Eye strikes again!

Mere hours after Steve Strong - Our Man in the Lobby - shared his searing analysis of Michael Green's leadership bid, it crashed and burned.

Shapps has caped, and is now attempting to rescue demic Rushi Sunak, the erstwhile and Machiavellian Chancellor.

Just moments ago, we asked Steve for his exclusive analysis on the very latest developments.

Here is Eye's report, Live from Westminster:

Intern: Hello Steve, what's happening?

Steve: I'm in the pub, who is this?

Intern: I'm from Railway Eye, the...

Steve: Who? Never heard of it! Now, why don't you just pis... (owing to technical difficulties the call ended at this point).

There you have it: Eye - First with all the railway news pixable!

UPDATE: No, we will not offer a reimbursement of any investments in the 100/1 shot! What goes up, can also come down. Evidently.