2009 Railway Garden Competition #XXVIII

This just in from a Mr Fergie-Lee...

Pictured is Malton, in the delightful district of Ryedale in North Yorkshire (of Calendar Girls fame); a station with just one platform face, a signalbox that looks like it was built by King John and a café that serves the best vegetarian quiche this side of Didsbury.

However, it is a shame that passengers to such a fine market town have to contemplate this screen of crappy vegetation whilst waiting for their train to York or Scarborough.


While the station buildings have been sensitively modernised, only the coming of Autumn will damp down the usual collection of weeds in the six foot, while the screen of scrubby silver birch trees just serves to show that if it isn't covered by a franchise commitment, nobody gives a monkey's.

What would Helen Mirren say?

UPDATE: This from a Mr Rodgers...

I suspect that Helen Mirren would have very little to say!

Yes, Malton is in Ryedale (District Council) but this is not the same place as where 'Calendar Girls' was set which was filmed in and around Grassington in the Yorkshire Dales, a mere 60+ miles away albeit in Yorkshire.

Mind you at least your contributor has also been caught without his clothes on (so to speak).

Balkanisation at Railnews

With the Noble Lord justifiably proud of his Greek antecedents is someone at Railnews labouring the point?

CYCLING HUBS

Lord Adonios also announced to the Labour conference a £14 million programme to create cycling hubs in ten major stations as part of the government's green transport policy.

Perhaps we should be toldios...

UPDATE: This from EastWestDivide...

But will the railway cycling hubs be Sturmey-Archer 3-speed?

Spot the Operator #4

And this one stretching the rule slightly.

Using your skill and judgment can you identify this well known Railway Operator who retired last week?


Answers please on a postcard to The Connect Project...

Spot the Operator #3

And yet one more for your consideration, this with an Underground theme.

Using your skill and judgment can you identify this well known lady Railway Operator?


Answers please on a postcard to the Metropolitan Railw... ooops, line.

Spot the Operator #2

And one more for your delectation and delight

Using your skill and judgment can you identify this well known Railway Operator?


Answers please on a postcard to Virgin Trains...

More please...

Spot the Operator #1

An exciting new competition from the Eye!

Using your skill and judgment can you identify this well known Railway Operator?


Answers please on a postcard to East Midlands Trains...

UPDATE: This from Shiny Shoes...

Great to see Shoveller shunting - mind you he was a guard at some point in his early career - so not afraid of getting his hands dirty.

But what's this?!

Undertaking probably one of the most risky jobs on the railway without correct PPE - where's your bump hat?

Surely a case of 'do as I say - not as I do'. East Mids shunters please take note (if such a thing still exists).

By the way the 'hanging gardens of Crewe' are slowly being removed.

Not on!

This from Police Oracle...

A British Transport Police officer investigating reports of suspected cable thieves near Langley Mill railway station, Derbyshire has been seriously assaulted by one of the suspects.

The incident occurred around 00:30 hours on Sunday, 27 September, after police reacted to a report of intruders lineside in the vicinity of Milnhay Road, some 300 yards south of Langley Mill station.

Anyone with information relating to this incident is urged to contact British Transport Police urgently on Freefone 0800 405040 or Crimestoppers on 0800 555111

Waterman apologises...

This from Pete's Blog...

Apologies to Model Rail

'Nuff said.

Musings on referendum promises...

Forgive me...

...but weren't we previously promised a referendum by this government?

Once bitten, twice shy.

More changes at London Midland - still doomed

As predicted by the Eye there have been further developments at beleaguered London Midland.

Yesterday LM errr... misplaced its Ops Director, Andy Thomas.

Steve Law has been drafted in as acting replacement.

Sources suggest that the axe hasn't stopped swinging yet...

UPDATE: This from 37422...

It gets worse.

Thanks to the train crew payments farce, Station Managers are now unable to buy any stores without finance director sign off.

Bring your own bog roll!

The RMT company council have advised LM that all station grade RMT members will be re-balloted for the Sunday payments.

Vacancies remain unfilled and stations remain closed as a consequence.

Happy days.

I give it until December before LM joins the WNXX pool.

Resco goes into Administration

***Farewell then to Resco - which appointed Administrators yesterday***

Conference news - Battle of the Fringe

Telegrammed by Party Animal
A busy evening in Brighton last night.

With at least three industry soirees taking place there was fierce competition to see who could attract the best speakers.

Whilst Bombardier and Network Rail had to make do with Lord Adonis one cheeky Open Access operator secured the PM for its Northern Night do!


Let's hope arch-blogger Guido Fawkes isn't correct in describing him as Jonah Brown...

UPDATE: This from NR's Internet Rapid Rebuttal Unit...

Not just Adonis.

Network Rail also had Amir Khan who is, of course, the face of our No Messin' campaign.

Meanwhile might the term 'Jonah Brown' be better applied to soi disant 'veteran observer' and Grand Central PR monkey Brennan-Brown?

NR exposes RAIL's secret HS2 plans- Shocker

This just in from Network Rail's Internet Rapid Rebuttal Unit...

Our friends at RAIL magazine were less than complimentary about our plans for high-speed rail in the new lines study.

However, we at Network Rail can always accept constructive criticism.

So we were thrilled to learn that Peterborough's finest minds have actually come up with their own high-speed proposal.


This leaked map proves, as ever, the magazine has got right the detailed analysis that Britain's 21st century rail system needs.

UPDATE: This, surprisingly, from the late Kenneth Williams...

These concerted attacks on RAIL by the high speed line fantasists remind me of my favourite line from my role as Caesar in Carry on Cleo.

'Infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me'.

Isn't it about time for Jim Steer to have a go at Nije 'n' Phil? Otherwise people might think that Greengauge is not a proper grown up pressure group.

Stop messin' about Jim.

UPDATE: This, unsurprisingly, from Nigel Harris...

How can the alleged HSR map from NR's Internet Rapid Rebuttal Unit (IRRU) possibly be taken seriously?

If it really WAS the product of ‘Peterborough’s finest’ then, as any fule kno, it would go via Rose Grove and Copy Pit...

Perhaps all those pre-holiday fillings have addled the IRRU's brain?

UPDATE: This from a Mr D Lane, who appears to dabble in such things...

I would label this as the "Big W" or 'Woolworths' Plan.

'Nuff said, I think!

UPDATE: This from Leo Pink...

Surely Nigel's preferred route would run from Peterborough to Leicester, thence direct to Manchester London Road...

UPDATE: This just in from Phil Haigh...

Since my gaffer's stuck his oar into this one, I might as well offer a view too...

With my frequent journeys between London, Peterborough, York and Newcastle, the East Coast Main Line will do me quite well enough.

All it needs is 140mph trains.

But wait, didn't BR introduce these in the 1990s...?

Wolmar in bribery shocker!

This just in from Christian Wolmar...

Next Monday (5th October) I am doing a literary dinner at Foyles in St Pancras - meal , lots of Wolmar babble and then book signing.

Do you think you could give it some deeply sarcastic plug on your site making sure you include details below?

Tickets are £35 and details are available from Helen Cook helen.cook@searcys.co.uk (Tel: 0207 923 5454).

Drink will be poured down your gullet next time I see you...

Certainly not - The Fact Compiler cannot be bought but make it a large one and I'll see what Eye can do.

PM bounces back from depression slur

Good news for Labour Party members in Brighton!

This from Railnews...

Prime Minister 'excited' by high speed rail and a new Age of the Train

And, Andrew Marr please note, not a happy pill in sight!

UPDATE: This from Steve Strong...

Don't be so sure - with the numbers involved (£35bn) it's probably electric shock therapy.

Imperial Wharf opening falls flat

Telegrammed by The Master
A bowler tip to London Connections for reminding Eye that the new Imperial Wharf station was due to open today.

Alas

The first train to call at the new (and much delayed) station this morning... was cancelled:

Headcode: 2M18 UID: W43986 27/09/2009 0815 Clapham Junction [CLJ] to Watford Junction [WFJ]

Location FD Sch. Sch. Expected Expected PL Lateness DR
Arr. Dep. Arrival Departure
Clapham Junction [CLJ] 0815 Cancelled 2
LTCHMRJ Pass 0817 Pass -
Imperial Wharf [IMW] 0819 0819 Cancelled Cancelled
West Brompton [WBP] 0822 0822 Cancelled Cancelled 4
Kensington Olympia [KPA] 0826 0825 2 -1
Shepherds Bush [SPB] 0828 0827 2 -1
NPLE813 Pass 0832 Pass -
MTRBDGJ Pass 0835 Pass -
Willesden Junction [WIJ] Pass 0841 Pass -
WLSDNNJ Pass 0842 Pass -
Wembley Central [WMB] Pass 0844 Pass -
Harrow & Wealdstone [HRW] 0848 0848 Cancelled Cancelled
Watford Junction [WFJ] 0858 Cancelled 10

One just hopes members of the Fourth Estate were still aslumber...

Birthday Greetings

***Eye wishes NR's Internet Rapid Rebuttal Unit a happy birthday.***

London Midland goes from bad to worse?

This intriguing snippet from 37422...

Keep an eye on London Midland this week. Expect some interesting announcements.

What on earth could this mean?

Surely not more service cuts on top of those already revealed by the Express and Star?

Yoghurt Rail curdles?

A bowler tip to Sim Harris and King Henry for this...

An exciting weekend for Yoghurt Rail watchers.

This press release emerged from Grand Central yesterday:

Grand Central statement on Alliance Rail Holdings Limited

On Thursday 24 September 2009 Alliance Rail Holdings Limited (Alliance Rail) issued a press release containing details of a submission to the Office of Rail Regulation (ORR) of plans for new "Open Access" services on the East Coast Main Line (ECML) by the Great North Eastern Railway Company (GNER) and also plans by the Great North Western Railway Company (GNWR) for new high speed services on the West Coast Main Line (WMCL).

The board of directors of Grand Central Railway Company Limited (Grand Central) wish to clarify that:

1. Ian Yeowart, director of Alliance Rail, was dismissed from his position as an employee and director of Grand Central on 27 May 2009. His dismissal is currently the subject of proceedings in the Employment Tribunal.

2. Certain of the routes identified by Mr Yeowart in connection with Alliance Rail's proposed new Open Access plans include routes in which the Grand Central group has registered an interest with the ORR and on which Mr Yeowart worked in the course of his duties with Grand Central.

3. The board of Grand Central considers that Mr Yeowart remains bound by certain post-employment obligations owed to the company by virtue of his former employment. Mr Yeowart also remains subject to obligations imposed upon him pursuant to the terms of the agreement relating to his investment in Sula TOC Limited ("Sula TOC"), Grand Central's holding company (which obligations will continue to apply for a period of twelve months after he ceases to be a shareholder of Sula TOC). Grand Central is concerned that, by reason of his recent actions, Mr Yeowart may be in breach of certain of these obligations, and is undertaking further investigations in this regard.

4. Mr Yeowart is currently a shareholder in Sula TOC. His dismissal by Grand Central, however, entitles Sula TOC's board of directors under the terms of the articles of association of that company to require Mr Yeowart to sell his shareholding in Sula TOC. The steps required to effect such a transfer of his shares are currently in process.

5. Grand Central is currently considering its legal position regarding Alliance Rail's proposed new open access services and particularly Mr Yeowart's involvement therein.

Meanwhile, King Henry advises that "if you google Mr Y's personal company 'OA Consultants' (which apparently stands for Open Access) you find 'Orecchia and Artieri Consultants', tax planners in Monaco."

Has Yoghurt Rail gone offshore already?

UPDATE: This from Charles Yerkes...

Old news!

This press release was on both the WNXX Forum and UK.railway yesterday!

Has The Fact Compiler been asleep?

Lookalike - Rise of the machines

Last week saw the launch of Wolmar's new tome Blood, Iron and Gold.

As the Noble Lord himself was guest of honour the event was packed full of transport luvvies (Peter Hendy, Tony Travers, David Begg, Ken Livingstone, Bernard Gambrill, Jeremy Candfield, Gordon Pettit, etc...).

Invited to say a few words Adonis took the floor; bemoaning the demise of British Rail as "an act of wanton destruction" he swiftly moved on to review Wolmar's book and over the next 15 minutes, in a tour de force of impromptu oratory, he regurgitated whole chunks from memory.

Adonis is not a man - he's a machine!

And with rumours that the Tories will appoint him as Chairman of HS2 after the election Eye brings you its latest Lookalike!


Eye can already imagine Adonis' first words to Prime Minister Cameron: "Your clothes... give them to me, now!".

UPDATE: This from AlanG...

Any mention by Wolmar of bidets?

Thankfully no!

UPDATE: This from our man at 222 Marylebone Road...

It looks as though the Noble Lord's cover has slipped.

All that work by the Railway Liberation Front to get a high level mole into DfT could be put in jeopardy by a little slip.

Let's hope Gordo doesn't read Eye!!