First for not being first...

The Gruaniad Travel Awards have just been announced (with a bowler tip to Chiltern):

Best train company:

Eurostar takes the honours for the third year in a row.

Top five: 1. Eurostar 2. Chiltern Railways 3. Eurotunnel 4. First ScotRail 5. Virgin Trains

Eye supposes it would be churlish not to congratulate First ScotRail for making it into the top five.

UPDATE: This from the Archer...

So two of the top three are non-franchised operators and the third got the only twenty-year franchise.

So, in terms of the usual 7 or 10 year franchises; First did indeed come first.

Shocking but true.

Next week: Network Rail voted The Gruaniad's top Infrastructure provider.

Airlines show how to do PA announcements

When you're small you have to try that little bit harder...




"You will not get that on United Airlines, I guarantee you."

Nice!

With apologies to those who already follow The Fact Compiler on Twatter and FaceAche.

UPDATE: This just in from 'Is 1A03 out of Chester yet, Bert?'



On second thoughts The Fact Compiler will take his chances with God's Own County Airways...

UPDATE: This from Inspector Blakey...

Bit of a stretch to call Southwest Airlines small, old man. It's the biggest airline in the world in terms of passenger numbers...

From an ex-pat temporarily marooned in the States.

Railway the wrong way

This just in from a Mr Wood...

Please see forum entry posted today at 7.29:

“An update...

43321+43357 on 1V50....

Set ran ECS EC - Edinburgh Waverley then Edinburgh Waverley to Berwick on Tweed.
1V50 starts from Berwick on Tweed, 22 late and the reason...

wait for it...

A shortage of available staff to dispatch the train at Edinburgh Waverley!

Don't want to put the poor dears at NXEC out do we?

Pointless signs - First for effort

Bloke with chainsaw becomes millionaire

The Eye finally understands why Alan Titchmarsh is rolling in lolly.

This from the BBC with a bowler tip to AlanG...

Network Rail... says there are are 21,000 miles of track to keep clear and the cost of pruning and felling trees is between £20,000 and £50,000 per mile.

How much?!?

UPDATE: This, somewhat unbelievably, from Capability Brown...

Sir

As one who has supervised the felling of countless trees when improving country estates, may I comment on the costs of removing arboreal features alongside the rail-way?

Say 500 guineas to fell a tree. Then 20,000 guineas a mile represents 40 trees or one every 132 feet, which does not seem too high a frequency in my personal observations.

Might I crave your indulgence to add that nothing so pleases the eye of God and man as a well ordered estate and that Mr Coucher Esq would do well to restore his linesides to the pristine nature of yesteryear by razing embankments and cuttings within his way leave to grass.

I would hope to see, in particular, the elimination of that abomination the Buddleia.

I remain, Sir,
Your Humble and Obt Svt

Lancelot Brown

UPDATE: This just in from Captain Deltic...

Is Capability Brown related to the well known PR hack Incapability Brennan-Brown?

UPDATE: This just in from Rupert Brennan Brown...

No!

Oxford to lose out on Electrification plans

This from Dreaming Spires...

Much raising of Oxford mortar boards when Lord Adonis announced in July that his alma mater should join the electrified network.

Indeed the Noble Lord rushed back from cabinet in Cardiff to confirm the good news in person!

Magnum cum laude.

However, judging by this ATOC faux pas, at least one Oxon alumnus needs to try harder.


Produced by ATOC's press office to promote additional electrification schemes, it suggests that Didcot to Oxford is now relegated to a 'proposed route'.

Let's hope that St Benets Hall is suitably forgiving of M Roberts MA.

Harper joins AECOM

This from New Civil Engineer...

Former Metronet CEO Andie Harper has joined AECOM as director of programme management for transport and infrastructure.

Is Transport for London planning to takeover AECOM over as well?

The dangers of Facebook explained

This from the Evening Standard...

I'm an easygoing Jedi, says Tube worker in abuse row

Twisted by the Dark Side, young Morbin has become.

XC and LM believe less is more?

This just in from the Wicked Weaver...

Informed yesterday that LM have lightened their HQ by about 100 people during the last week, and that there will be more downsizing before Guy Fawkes Day.

Also: that 'economics' is the reason why two of XC's five HST sets will be stood down at the December TT change.

Harris returns!

Nigel Harris has returned to the blogosphere and he's in fine form too.

Nigel writes...

It therefore shocked me that behind the apparent sharp focus and some very expensive TV commercials, a toxic culture of complacency - arrogance, even – seemingly contaminates NR's approach to this appalling risk.

That'll be one less Christmas card for Iain Coucher to sign.

Pointless signs #15

This from Liss station with a bowler tip to Turbostar...

This was taken in June - anyone know if it's still there?

UPDATE: This just in from SouthWestTrains Guard

Not really a pointless sign, more of an out of date sign.

When Desiros first came to SWT we had both 444 (5 car) and 450 (4 car) stops as well as 442 (5 car) and the older 4,8,12 the latter being for the slam door stock, Desiros and 442's being longer.

These should have all been changed by now to 3,4,5,6,8,9,10,12 and variations of these (4-5, 8-12) and of course 'S' to allow for all the differing formations of our stock.

It is quite possible this one was overlooked

National Express update

Looks like the wheels have come off the Cosmen CVC deal and with it Stagecoach's rescue of the C2C and NXEA franchises.

Whilst this leaves National Express in the brown stuff it may prove even more embarrassing for the Noble Lord.

City lawyers are rumoured to be dusting off wheelbarrows in the expectation of huge fees for sorting out Cross Default.

UPDATE: This from Leo Pink...

So that's 'rescued' as in 'Blackbeard the Pirate' rescued' the passengers on passing merchant ships?

See also 'liberated' as in my dad 'liberated' the Iron Cross in my medal collection.

UPDATE: This from Ithuriel...

So does this mean that wee Brian's court battle against the Department of Dogs' Breakfasts over the timing of cap and collar, the delays to ITSO smartcards and compensation for the missing £200 million is on again?

Will the lawyers have enough wheelbarrows to go round?

Shadow Treasury team fully briefed on Crossrail

Splendid news from the new egalitarian Tory party (with a bowler tip to the Raver).

Only last week Boris was taking supper with the terribly grand Osbornes.

Alas

Over dinner it emerged that Mrs O had never heard of Crossrail!

At least Mr O, the Shadow Chancellor, was better informed.

Although poor Boris was shocked to discover that George thought it ran North to South!

No matter

Presumably it will still call at one's club?

Lookalike - the Dark Chapters

***A depressing entry on Losing Track.***

Save Election Night!

With a bowler tip to Tom Harris MP...

This early day motion has been laid down...

That this House is concerned at reports that growing numbers of Returning Officers are considering postponing the counting of votes cast on the day of the General Election until the day after polling; believes that in the 21st century it would be a regressive move not to announce constituency results as early as possible; further believes that public confidence in the results could be undermined by delays in the counting of ballot papers and that fewer voters would be able to watch the results being announced if this were done on a Friday afternoon; and calls on local authorities throughout the United Kingdom to ensure that all ballot papers are counted immediately after the close of polls on General Election night, as has been the practice in previous General Elections.

Vote early, vote often!

London Midland update

This just in from 3362 Albert Brassey...

As the floors of 102 New Street start to resemble the US embassy in Saigon (circa '75) the next thing to be hurled out the window is train cleaning.

Furthermore the normally supine TSSA has threatened to withdraw the paperclips and has started balloting white collar staff over pay.

Given that they don't usually drive or guard trains and so haven't been bunged money to keep the job on the road, expect a resounding result.

More Govia bods are rumoured to be heading north to sort the sorry mess out.

Rich man robbed - Shocker

This from the BBC...

Scottish transport tycoons Brian Souter and Ann Gloag are alleged to have been stung by a prominent City financier who has apparently disappeared.

Stop sniggering at the back!

NR goegraphically challenged - Official

This just in from Bushy...

Wouldn't you think that Network Rail staff would have some geographic knowledge of their rail network.

My colleague has just received an invite from Nitwonk Fail to an event.

First few details are:

WHO: BOSTON TO SKEGNESS PROJECT TEAM
WHAT: TO SEE THE BOSTON SKEGNESS PROJECT FIRST HAND
WHERE: SIVSEY YARD, STATION ROAD, SIVSEY, LINCOLNSHIRE, PE22 0SA

I just wonder how many guests will struggle to find Sivsey.

At least Google is brighter than NR and asks "do you mean SIBSEY ".

Dreadful, innit!

Can we start a collection to buy NR's Midland & Continental press office a rail atlas?

UPDATE: This just in from an indignant Network Rail...

Ref "NR goegraphically challenged - Official"

Unless I have misplace my irony hat, I hope this is deliberate typo.

It must be a deliberate typo. Mustn't it?

Otherwise you would not have the gall to post such tediously pedantic drivel about a Network Rail press invitation that unfortunately said 'Sivsey' rather than the correct 'Sibsey'.

You may notice just how close 'V' and 'B' are on a keyboard (cont p94)...

UPDATE: This from the late Sir William Pollitt...

Network Rail's 'indignant' response about the 'Sivsey' cock-up speaks volumes about their lax attitude. They really do not 'get it' do they? (to use a phrase of the moment).

It's an invitation. To a place. That doesn't exist! Do they expect their intended guests to be psychic? The fact that 'v' is only the next key to 'b' on a QWERTY keyboard is utterly irrelevant. It explains the cock-up - it does not, as NR imply, excuse their lack of concern for detail.

On a slightly flippant note, a single character out of place can make all the difference. For example, the famous love song would have lost all its mystique if the title had been typed in NR's press office. 'People will think we're in Hove' would just not have cut it. Likewise, Frank Sinatra singing "I've got you under my sink' would likewise have hardly hit the spot, despite the misplacing of a mere single letter!!

More seriously, minor typographical errors could well be the peg on which a libel or defamation case could quite easily hang. As in the expression: 'Network Rail's press office is utterly clueless.' The omission of the three characters forming the word 'not' between 'is' and 'utterly' makes all the difference, eh?

More care, please.

Time to put Frankenstein back in its box

Good news for fans of the IEP (Sid and Doris Bonkers).

This from Leasing Life...

A shortage of liquidity has meant that financing for one of Britain's largest ever rail projects, the Intercity Express Programme (IEP), will be sourced through five or six tranches of debt-raising rather than through one or two lump sum payments as had been originally planned.

While the delivery of the first batch of trains is likely to take place one year late (in 2014 rather than 2013 as was originally planned).

Isn't this all a bit previous?

The Department hasn't actually signed a contract for any of these trains yet.

Seasonal conundrum

When does winter start?

The Fact Compiler likes the old ways and thus marks the start of Autumn from Lammas Day (1st August).

Which means that there are just over two weeks till the start of Winter.

Eye wonders if Moley knew this when he provided the following written answer in Parliament yesterday:

On 23 July, the Government announced a major new electrification programme which radically affects the requirements for train rolling stock over the next decade. In particular, there will be far less need for diesel trains and a greater requirement for electric trains. The Department will publish a new rolling stock plan in the autumn, setting out a revised strategy.

The clock's ticking.