Pointless signs - the audio version

This from a Mr Malins...

There are as many, probably a lot more, pointless announcements as there are pointless signs.

At Bridgend there is an automated one running on the footbridge with the same message, but interestingly only in English.

Surely they could have added Welsh for good measure, and this one runs all night, even when there is no traffic.

Maybe it's for the Clubbers coming back from Swansea, who are in no condition to take it in anyway.

Back to the future - NR adopts double arrow

It appears that Network Rail's Midlands Region can read the runes!


The arrows of indecision clearly looks a safer bet than doomed NR's back of a fag packet logo...

UPDATE: This from Our International Correspondent (and others)...

The Met Rly/GCR boundary sign at Mantles Wood is very smart, and even the proportions and perspective on the "BR" double arrow are right, so unlike Banbury and other piss poor examples see Eye Passim.

But why is this sign so nice, when usually for NR any old thing will do?

Because, to judge from the typeface and colours, it isn't an NR sign. It's a TfL production.

The opposing sign which would be the responsibility of NR - "You Are Now Leaving Coucherland - Use the SPT to ask a Grown Up before passing this point" - is probably not nearly as smart, if it exists at all.

First Network Rail?

The Independent on Sunday will have caused many a ruined breakfast with its list of industry figures keen to take on Iain Coucher's job.

According to the Sindie the great Dr Mike 'Death' Mitchell "is understood to have privately expressed an interest in the role."

No doubt this joyful news will have been welcomed by the nation's interior designers, whose skills will now be in great demand to remove embedded cornflakes sprayed into soft furnishings.

Once recovered from the Heimlich Maneuver industry bigwigs will also have been comforted to read that two further First alumni - Nicola 'Not So' Shaw and Andrew 'I Closed the Skies' Haines - are also rumoured to be in the frame.

Perhaps there is a chapter on career progression in Sir Moir's Lovely Book?


Fortunately, before any further damage was done to the nation's stock of rail executives, the Sindie piece made clear that NR has hired headhunters, Egon Zehnder, with a brief to seek candidates with experience running international companies.

The resulting sighs of relief issuing from across industry breakfast tables are apparently audible in deep space.

Pointless signs - York

Stockade station - Birmingham International

This from D0260...

Further to Eye's piece on the Coucher Memorial Fences at Stockport, welcome to Birmingham International, or should that be HMP Elmdon?

About a month ago each and every platform end, north and south, was fenced at the top of the platform end ramp.

These photographs are the north end of Birmingham International station, taken from Platform 4, nearest the NEC.


A similar thing has happened at Coventry, but as the platforms there are narrower, the fencing is not quite so intrusive.

At Birmingham International the sides of the fencing, usually finished in triangular wood, now sports a sort of giant egg-box of shredded rubber tyres.


How much did this lot cost?

Indeed!

Eye was pleased to see that Nigel Harris over at RAIL has also taken up the cudgels against the apparent relentless march of these costly genuflections to the Elf''n'Safety Taliban (see Stop & Examine in the latest issue).

Perhaps ORR readers can advise whether this really offers a value for money solution to a percieved safety risk?

Bob Crow - just a pussy cat

This from the Tax Payers Alliance...

With Trade Union Leaders flexing their muscles with strike threats and warnings about impending public spending cuts, the Tax Payers' Alliance presents its first Trade Union Rich List.

The list compiles the detailed remuneration of all Trade Union General Secretaries and Chief Executives whose total remuneration exceeded £100,000 in the financial year 2008-09.

According to the TPA the RMT's Bob Crow earns £105,679 a year.

Now the TPA is not the most subtle of organisations, so to illustrate their findings they provided the following endearing image...


Eye will pay Fifty Guineas to the first industry MD who attempts to tickle Bob behind the ears.

An apology to our German readers

The Fact Compiler has been taken to task for stereotyping our Teutonic friends in the previous post.

Clearly in the new Europe this can not be tolerated.

To make amends Eye is happy to run this picture of the launch of ScotRail's new Class 380 EMU at Siemens, Wildenrath, yesterday.


No stereotypes there then.

Railway Garden Competition - Wildenrath

Railway Gardens German Style - efficiently defoliated!


No doubt the individual responsible for the visible fronds is currently contemplating a bleak future on the Eastern Front.

Rich man declines bonus - Shocker

This from the Gruaniad...

Peter Hendy, TfL's most senior official as London transport commissioner, has declined a bonus of £132,409 in addition to his salary of £330,198.

In an implied dig at his Network Rail peers, who said a performance-related pay scheme delivered better results for taxpayers, Hendy said TfL received public funds and had to "set an example".

Good effort.

'Nuff said.

ORR looks at East Coast timetable again

The Office of Rail Regulation today confirmed that it would "consider any alternative uses" for the London - Lincoln paths granted to East Coast.

Previously the state owned operator had said that they would operate seven return services a day between Lincoln and London. However, modelling work suggested that this service pattern would lose approximately £9m a year.

In its place East Coast proposed running just one daily return service from London to Lincoln and four shuttle services from London to Newark.

Other operators had protested that East Coast's revised proposals did not make best use of scarce resources on the ECML.

In a letter sent today to stakeholders Brian Kogan of ORR said:

As most of you will be aware, East Coast has recently announced that it no longer plans to operate seven weekday services each way between Lincoln and London. Instead it wishes to operate just one service each way, with a further four services each way operating between Newark and London. It has indicated that it intends to submit a track access application to amend its rights.

We have received representations from other operators pointing out that this is the second significant change to the destinations served since NXEC Trains Limited (National Express East Coast) submitted its original application for track access rights in June 2008, and suggesting that East Coast’s revised proposals do not make best use of the capacity available on the East Coast Main Line (ECML), and therefore that we should evaluate alternative proposals.

In November 2009 we agreed to East Coast’s request for a change of destination from Leeds to York. The reasons were set out in a letter to the industry dated 25 November 2009. But circumstances are now somewhat different:

• a key reason for agreeing to the original change was that, taking account of performance and journey time issues, it would be better if the new services continued beyond Doncaster to York rather than Leeds. No such argument applies in respect of the proposed change; and

• the service to be provided by East Coast to a new destination is significantly reduced.

For this reason we think we must consider any alternative uses for the capacity that other operators may put to us when we decide whether to approve East Coast’s new proposals.

However, we are not proposing a further major change to the timetable. Considerable time and effort has already been expended by Network Rail, train operators, funders and other stakeholders on the development of the standard pattern timetable, for implementation in May 2011, and it is not our intention that Network Rail should have to undertake significant further timetable development work. In particular, the broad pattern of the timetable should be as currently developed, and capacity must remain available within the standard pattern timetable for freight operators to run both Class 4 and Class 6 freight trains on the ECML.

We wish to make it clear that when evaluating any realistic alternative uses of the capacity available, we will not evaluate them solely against East Coast’s revised Lincoln/Newark proposals, but instead will do so against the amended SLC2 as a package, of which the Lincoln/Newark proposals form a part.

The ORR has asked for proposed alternatives to be submitted by no latter than 16 July 2010.

UPDATE: This from a Mr Swift...

I have a radical proposal to dovetail in with the ECML KX- Newark shuttle, it will be easy to implement as passenger flows will not be significant.

1. When the shuttles arrive at Newark, get all the passengers off and place them on a Newark to Retford shuttle.

2. When the Newark to Retford shuttle arrives at Retford, get all the passengers off and place them on a Retford to Doncaster shuttle.

3. When the Retford to Doncaster shuttle arrives at Doncaster get all the passengers off and place them on a service to York.

And what’s more – read this in reverse for a solution to the UP direction services, plus the added bonus of changing trains will be the opportunity to view the flourishing Railway Garden at Retford.

Hey Presto – we have extra York to London paths!

I must get this off to the ORR straightaway.

Phwoar - What a stunner!!!

This from Glenda Flagg...

Hats off to Rail Professional - it knows how to get the fellas pulses a racing.

Sticking Rail Barbie on the cover, a winking and a pouting through her long blond tresses with that come hither look.

Hither or thither, Glenda doesn't care!

Rail Barbie is welcome to ride our train anytime!! (shurely run our failing franchises anytime? Ed)

Move over Mr Coucher man, there's only one candidate for the Network Rail top job and it ain't Ice Lady Vickie!!! Geddit!?!!? (You're fired. Ed)

UPDATE: This from Fiscal Rectitude...

I note from the list of quangocrat salaries published today that Elaine Holt is paid between £180k and £184.999 a year to chair Directly Operated Railways.

As DOR only runs the East Coast franchise (which has its own MD) I am struggling to see what Rail Barbie actually does to earn this not inconsiderable sum.

Which ever way you look at it the East Coast/DOR management structure seems remarkably top heavy.

Do we really have to wait for the McNulty review before making the obvious saving?

Sparks effect at risk of fizzling out?

This insightful contribution from Thomas Docherty MP (Dunfermline and West Fife, Labour) in yesterday's Commons Energy Efficiency debate:

One thing that brings a wry smile to my face is hon. Members talking of the need for more railways and electric cars.

Those are admirable suggestions, and I support them, but it is never explained where we will get the energy to power those new electric trains and cars.

If we compare our consumption statistics with our supply statistics, the result is worrying. At its peak in 1998, the nuclear industry provided approximately 90,000 GWh. In 2008, the latest year for which figures are available, that had fallen to 48,000 GWh, although it has risen again slightly since then. At the same time, many of our coal-powered stations are coming to the end of their lives.

By the end of the coming decade, all our Magnox nuclear power stations will have closed, as will almost all of the advanced gas-cooled reactor nuclear power stations and many of our coal-powered stations-either because of new European regulations on carbon emissions, which both sides of the House would support, or because they have simply come to the end of their lives.

I suggest that we need to understand that, although the aim of being more efficient in our energy consumption is laudable, we face a massive energy gap that needs to be addressed.

Eye fears that the greatest threat to further electrification may not be a shortage of money, but a lack of juice.

Railway Garden Competition - Windsor Central

Rail Professional - making MPs accessible

Telegrammed by Our International Correspondent
Voters of Lincoln keen to talk to their new MP can now reach him night or day courtesy of Rail Professional magazine!

The very latest edition boasts a startlingly benign hagiography of Elaine Holt (44, married, one cat, a rabbit and 'model looks' we learn, helpfully) by Alan Salter (who he? – Ed).

To support the puff piece the mag's cover has a splendidly posed photo of the Directly Operated Railways supremo, smiling coquettishly into the lens through tumbling tresses, with her desk carefully decorated with appropriate 'props'.


And what carefully chosen props they are – a mug with “I love chocolate” patterns on it provides the necessary feminine touch and by way of counterpoint, a strategically placed document about the new ECML catering arrangements reminds us that the abolition of almost all traditional dining has been successful in reducing On Board Service costs.

So far so good.

However, Rail Amateur readers cannot live by bread alone – there must be circuses too.

Clearly changes to the SLC2 timetable are much occupying Elaine's mind at the moment and so, of course, there is a file upon her desk entitled 'Lincoln MPs'.

Close study reveals it to contain the profile of one Karl McCartney, Lincoln's newly elected Tory MP.

It tells us that “Lincoln Station is in his constituency and he has campaigned for the introduction of East Coast Lincoln services”.

But photo sessions with the great and good can be chaotic affairs and in the rush to get the lights working and for the subject to refresh lippie and eyeliner, there is always the risk that something will be missed.

And so it came to pass.

Added to McCartney's profile, in an unknown hand, is the MP’s mobile number.


Anyone wishing to discuss with Karl the one up and one down direct train that constitutes the tattered remains of the promise to give Lincoln a direct service now know where to reach him.

Just say Rail Professional gave you the number...

Villiers vignettes...

An occasional series celebrating the relationship of the Minister of State for Transport with her Department...

Theresa Villiers (Minister of State (Rail and Aviation), Transport; Chipping Barnet, Conservative) holding answer 24 June 2010

The two franchise extensions will have a theoretical opportunity cost caused by foregoing the higher premium/lower subsidy expected if the franchises were re-competed instead of extended. This is difficult to quantify, because assumptions need to be made about the likely prices from new bidders versus the cost of extending with incumbents.

The opportunity cost arising from the delay to replacing franchises was estimated to be £6 million for Essex Tameside and £18 million for Greater Anglia. However, we believe that including the two franchises in the reformed system, on which we will be consulting shortly, will yield benefits for passengers and facilitate investment in the railways which will outweigh these costs.

In accordance with our accreditation process as advised to bidders the Department does not expect to have cause to incur compensation.

So. DafT is still expecting to get more/pay less for these two franchises when re-reletting them in the middle of a recession?

Good effort!

Railway Garden Competition - Clapham Yard

This from Brighton Belle...

Clapham Yard, CY43 Ground Signal - a joint effort from SWT and NR.


Trains do regularly use the track to the left.

Hard to believe, isn't it?

This picture also adds substance to a recent rumour about the imminanet replacement of the Class 455 fleet.

It would appear that these new units really will be built by a consortium of Alstom, Bombardier and Flymo.

MacShoveller tosses caber in ring for NR CEO job

Evidently Eye's exciting new poll on who should succeed Iain Coucher is encouraging those in the industry to up their game.

This from the Northants Evening Telegraph...

The 42nd Chieftain of Corby's Highland Gathering has been unveiled as rail boss Tim Shoveller.

Mr Shoveller will preside over activities at the gathering on Sunday, July 11.

A clever ploy by EMT's boss to boost his credentials in the race to replace Coucher

By Eye's reckoning Chieftain Shoveller has just outranked the Laird of Iainland.

Railway Garden Competition - Duffield

This from Chionanthus Virginicus...

Here is the end of the platform at that well known leafy suburban station - beloved of Midland Railway Directors (and more recently senior executives of the Derby rail scene) - namely Duffield.


I see that some lateral thinkers at NR (possibly in response to Eye's platform-end fencing jibes) have decided to use this freely available vegetation to prevent passenger egress from the platform ends.

I am surprised that the "soi disant" so called veteran railway observer has not mentioned this!

NatEx - learns lessons from East Coast debacle

Just how far is Dean 'Long-tongue' Finch prepared to go, to ingratiate himself with Petrol-head and Cruella de Villiers?

This toe curling piece of National Express arslikan from the Gruaniad:

Dean Finch, chief executive of the firm, said the Department for Transport was right to warn passengers that it may scrap a fares cap that limits price increases to 1% above inflation.

"It is absolutely legitimate for anybody to look at, in terms of raising revenues," said Finch.

"Everybody complains about rail fares being awful, but we have more than 1bn journeys on the railways every year. That tells you that in the overall scheme of things the railway is an effective form of travel and is an integral part of peoples' lives."

Of course National Express knows all about 'raising revenues'.

Why less than a year ago the Bus Bandit group was banned from bidding for new franchises by former Secretary of State Lord Adonis.

The reason?

Whilst its East Coast franchise may have been an "integral part of peoples lives" it certainly wasn't that integral to National Excess, who threatened to dump the operation unless they paid a lot less lovely lolly to the tax-payer.

Sadly it was not to be and the group not only forfeited the premier East Coast franchise but its then Chief Exec as well.

No matter. National Express have obviously learnt their lesson.

No doubt NatEx will continue to focus on 'raising revenues', but this time at the expense of the poor bloody passenger.

NR GSMR project disconnected?

Exciting news from Network Rail's GSMR project!

Those are the chaps constructing telephone masts up and down the network.

At least that was the plan.

Sadly word reaches Eye that 200 of them have just been told that they will be 'released' in September to save cash.

With the project rumoured to be millions over budget this is perhaps no surprise.

Happily, in a further saving, the project plans to use 02 infrastructure on freight lines to save the construction costs of building dedicated masts.

If you've ever tried to use the 02 network aboard a train you will know that the savings in call costs can also be considerable...

UPDATE: This from Billy Connections...

From around March 2012 the radio frequencies used by existing cab to shore radios have been given to broadcasters in time for the massive number of radio microphone channels required for the London 2012 Olympics.

Of course - this does open up the possibility of the Olympic Games starting late due to "overrunning engineering work"!